On the path to CPP Disability

Yep, here I am again. Most active in the wee hours of the morning. I still don't understand why that is, but it IS. Seems a lot of people with chronic pain find themselves up at this hour. How do I know? Because we chat most of the night on Twitter.

I've known I will have to apply for CPP disability for a few months now. It's a fact that I am not going to be able to return to work any time soon, if ever. My pain is at a much better tolerance level than it has been (besides the 2 weeks of hell around Christmas), but there is so much more to Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome than just pain (as if that wasn't enough). Procrastination and the fear of rejection just can't hold me back any more. Days of confusion from medication, insomnia or not being able to stay awake can't hold me back anymore. I've GOT to get this done. 

I contacted a bunch of Toronto area lawyers that claimed they dealt with Disability cases by email tonight/this morning. I think some of them are more interested in taking on insurance companies, but surely one of them will actually be familiar with both Fibromyalgia and CPP disability applications. I hope I find one. I already know I qualify for CPP disability. I even know how much I'd get a month were I awarded CPP disability. The amount is peanuts, and insulting, but it's more than I make now (nothing). Or can make at all.

The biggest current issue is the financial stress (which we all know is no good for my health). Especially when we get threatened to be thrown out of our apartment monthly (yeah monthly). We are always late with the rent. But it always gets paid that month. Yet even after speaking to the property management office openly and honestly about our situation (and my illness), we go through this hateful threat process every damn month anyway. It's no surprise that a big corporation owns these apartment buildings. All they care about is the numbers, not the people. So we endure living in this horrible apartment building having to deal with the pharoah ants and carpet beetles that you can never get rid of and the fear of very scary residents doing questionable (and illegal) things. Surely this is enough to make me batty. It's all accumulative for sure. Pile it all on and no wonder I'm nearly bonkers, right? Or that I prefer NOT to leave the so called comfort of my home. Feeling safe, for me, is a very big deal.

I plan on documenting everything during my CPP disability application process and sharing it with you. I wish I had done that when I had to claim bankruptcy a few years ago. Mostly because there is no information online about CANADIAN disability claims or dealing with bankruptcy either. Sure you can find generic articles but actual helpful links and information sites, not so much. So I hope I can help others get through this process with as least pain as possible. Now I have to prove to total strangers that I really am sick and I really do need help. I'm not looking forward to it, but it has to be done. Like I said, the fear of rejection can't hold me back (and it has been).

On top of the CPP disability application, I'm going to seriously ask about how we've been treated as tenants in the apartment building we live in. We've been here 6 years or so and have never been a problem. Not noisy, don't park where we aren't supposed to, never leave flammables on the balcony, etc. We are late with rent all the time, but we pay it. We always pay it that same month. We just can't get ahead because we just don't make enough anymore. Yet I feel like we've been harassed because of the constant letters of threat to throw us out or inform us that police will be at our door to escort us out on a given date. We've been in open communication with the property management office on site here all this while. They say sure no problem, dont' worry about the letters. Yet we get them every month anyway! While I realize that because of the lower income people who live here they may find it necessary, I don't think it's right to lump everyone in as an automatic problem resident. Certainly all the harassing letters and threats cause me way  more stress than I need. Certainly it contributes to my pain levels too. 

Anyway, I have a lot of questions for the lawyer who decides to take me on. I even gave them my URL here. Read for themselves what it's been like for me. What kind of person I am. See if I'm worth their effort, even.

Too bad I can't take my own advice too huh? I've got to keep reminding myself that I AM worthy and I do deserve a decent quality of life even though I'm disabled and can't contribute financially anymore. So let's get this thing going and get it done! 

If you are a Canadian who has (or still is) going through the CPP Disability application process and you have some helpful links to share, or even personal insight or experience, do leave a comment! I hope this site becomes a resource for others like me who struggle daily with debilitating pain and need to apply for CPP disability to be able to live a decent quality of life that they deserve.

If you are a lawyer in Ontario who has offices in the Durham Region of Toronto and deals with CPP disability AND is familiar with Fibromyalgia, please contact me!


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  1. Michelle jadaa says:

    Do you fill out pain sheets or a daily journal of your pain levels and what you can or cant do on a given day?Have you been to a psychologist or psychiatrist concerning your fibro.Have you attended one of those "living with chronic pain" courses.Do you go to physiotherapy  or massage therapist?You basicly need to document how fibro affects your life and if you have any other professionals that can help you with a report of this.The Dr's usually write the bare minimum which tends not to help.
    I just got approved on my second try without a lawyer and im getting it backdated ,thank goodness.

    • I am still waiting to get in to the pain clinic. My primary care doctor is totally on board and willing to help me do what needs to be done. I'd go to a psychiatrist if it was necessary. Or if the lawyer thinks I should. I can't afford physio or massage therapy, insurance does not cover it. I do have a journal, but I use it more for trying to keep track of when I took pain meds (how much and at what time). Otherwise I'd forget and overdose or something lol. I will start a pain journal though. When I first got sick I had one going, but after a while it just got repetitive you know? I don't know when I stopped that, but I have 2 physical books full of times and dates for when I took meds, what kind and what dosage.

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